i have to be honest with you. i'm slowly losing my trust on you...

i've been thinking about it and realized that it's BOTH OUR fault.

i know i'm uber paranoid to the point that i can have an imaginary girl for you. i am paranoid that you either have a new one or that you're still together with your past. i'm mad at myself for being crazy. i guess that's what i could call karma.

as you know, i was a playgirl back then, so i know the "styles" to hide that kind of secret. When i think about the things you do, i compare them to the actions of my old self. how you react to certain things, how you are whenever you are with me, and other stuff that could help me decipher your actions. just so i would find out if like the old me, you also have another one.

you're not helping me build my trust on you. you are even doing the opposite thing! you're making me lose my trust!!!! i realized that you haven't really let go of your past. you kept her pictures on your phone until i found out and saw it.... you never deleted those pictures until i saw them! what if i never saw those pictures, will you ever get rid of them? maybe not.

you always keep secretsfrom me.... what am i to you? don't you love me? don't you trust me? why do you have to hide secrets from me... am i not your girlfriend? why do you have to hide your wallet from me? no matter how many times i bug you about it, you wouldn't budge... :(

i don't like this kind of feeling...

I LOVE YOU..
I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY LOVE YOU..

if you only know how much hurt i'm feeling right now.. smiles can be faked you know... i have to pretend that i'm alright so you'll be alright. i don't like seeing you  mad/sad, that's why i pretended a while ago that i was alright... also because i know that you'll get of me if i'll show you how i really feel.. you don't like it whenever i'm whiney or hot tempered.. i'm sorry...

i love you so much!!! i love you, pig :@)